tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48838468597990241302024-03-12T23:21:33.741-04:00FORMERLY FAT MOMOne-time fitness infomercial success story turned self-accepting couch potato. I write about what I've learned (and what I haven't) as I trudge through middle age with a semi-healthy mix of self-deprecation and determination.
ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comBlogger113125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-64985046547833994602022-11-08T18:33:00.000-05:002022-11-08T18:33:38.739-05:00I'm Back, Back in the New York Groove{title stolen from Back In the New York Groove by Ace Frehly}Well hey there, Blogosphere! Is there even a Blogosphere anymore? So, yeah, it’s been five years since I published an entry. Here’s a quick update:-My dad is still dead.-My mom is still alive. She’s 78.-I am not a workout enthusiast anymore, but I do Pilates and I try not to eat myself out of my clothes.-I’m closer to 50 than ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-19073926426847183352017-10-19T12:18:00.000-04:002017-12-18T09:44:28.365-05:00Now That It's One Year (Song: One Year/artist: Feist)
May 12, 2017
Well, I did it, y'all. I survived the first year of life without my dad, and all the painful reminders that accompanied it. Father's Day, summer in my hometown, Thanksgiving, December 11 - his birthday, Christmas, New Year's Day, my birthday...and finally, the first anniversary of his death. And while I thought that would be ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-81805737704075036672017-04-24T11:14:00.002-04:002017-04-24T11:14:57.059-04:00Moving Forward And Not Looking Back
(song: Coming of Age/artist: Foster the People)
On my 40th, I wrote about my burgeoning mid-life identity crisis. I hired a therapist. At 41, I was recovering from back surgery and feeling hopeful -- Thanks to my therapist. Two months later, the crushing loss of my father would make back surgery feel like a stubbed toe in comparison. My therapist worked overtime. And ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-46813771798451565842017-02-16T12:30:00.000-05:002017-02-16T13:32:19.165-05:00I Keep Crawling Back To You
(song: Crawling Back To You/artist: Tom Petty)
REJOICE! For I have seen Leandro! Almost five years to the date of my first day in his test group, we reunited for a small group workout at his new studio. When Leandro sent a text message inviting me to come to class on Valentine's Day, my knee-jerk reply to him was, "I've gained so much weight, I hate for you to see me." But of courseALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-89216707450463717172017-01-19T18:00:00.000-05:002017-01-20T09:56:12.547-05:00It Has Been Quite A Year(song: Aperture/artist: Sleeping At Last)
It's a new year, y'all! Thank sweet Baby Jesus, 2016 is OVER!
I don't know who created this, but I love that person.
I rang in 2016 on a cane, then later in the year, my dad died. So, yeah, it pretty much sucked. I'm still dealing with all of that. Suffice it to say, I'm still sad and I still cry at least once a day (usually for less than 30 ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-59158412021264505812016-11-07T17:46:00.000-05:002016-11-07T18:33:30.333-05:00So Ripe And Ready To Diminish And Deride(song: Borderlines/artist: Joni Mitchell)
A few months ago a parenting acquaintance, let's call him Warren, asked for a favor. I was not able to help him out as I was in Georgia visiting my very sick father. Warren was pissed I could not fulfill his needs, so he did the mature thing and confronted me in a public space. As he walked towards me, all puffed up like a gamecock entering the ring, ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-87125200531015733782016-07-21T14:44:00.001-04:002016-07-21T14:59:03.121-04:00Learning To Face The Path At Your Pace(song: Watershed/artist: Indigo Girls)
Greetings from the coastal south! I'm in the beginning of my annual summer eat-a-thon, I mean, summer break in Georgia. My son is my traveling companion and he's a super one at that. We drove from Brooklyn to St. Simons Island with very few grumbles from the backseat. Modern technology makes two-day drives far more tolerable than the days of the ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-21732540488909759842016-06-14T10:38:00.000-04:002016-06-14T10:38:58.780-04:00Now I Can Find Relief. I Grieve.
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ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-68524303183672248592016-05-05T13:36:00.001-04:002016-05-05T13:37:57.584-04:00It's Such A Shame Our Friendship Had To End(song: Purple Rain/artist: Prince)
I had a social media intervention with myself. I freely admit that I spend entirely too much time surfing Facebook and Instagram, but I was also wasting precious time by trolling my running apps and peering into the lives of my able-bodied running "friends".
Recently, I ran into a cyclist pal that I noticed hadn't been logging his rides on our ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-71232130646401631012016-03-28T00:15:00.000-04:002016-03-31T08:34:59.177-04:00I'm Bigger, One Whole Year!
(song: Birthday/artist: David Weinstone)
March 26, 2016
Today I am 41 years old. Just after my 40th birthday, I wrote this post about my feelings of inadequacy and how I let my fear of, pretty much everything, hold me back from personal growth and progress. When disaster struck in November and I needed emergency back surgery, I was devastated. But when I started the outline for this post,ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-87180678808414446242016-03-03T16:34:00.000-05:002016-03-03T16:35:17.933-05:00Underneath It All...I think I'm Afraid When There's Nothing Wrong
(artist:Cyndi Lauper/song: Fearless)
I skew slightly crazy. My friends and family know this to be true. I am the queen of irrational fear. For example, my fear of flying is not your run-of-the-mill fear of flying. Mine only started after I got engaged and finally had something good happening in my life; I convinced myself something awful would happen before I made it down the aisle. My ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-80932015008912584752016-02-26T19:50:00.001-05:002016-02-26T20:46:32.086-05:00How Long? Tell Me, How Long?(song: Wait For Spring To Come/artist: John Butler Trio)
Jan 21, 2016
On the advice of my surgeon at my 3-week follow-up, today I saw neurologist Dr. Dora Leung at Hospital for Special Surgery. The purpose of the visit was to assess the extent of the nerve damage and (hopefully) get some idea of a time frame for my recovery.
Ready to be (literally) poked and prodded.
After I got ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-66033840420884952522016-02-16T16:45:00.000-05:002016-02-16T18:08:59.150-05:00This Is Your New Thing Now
(song: New Thing Now/artist: Shawn Colvin)
I had an epiphany of sorts during therapy (psycho, not physical) this week.
In 2011, I got an email from Beachbody®, telling me about an audition two days later for the Brazil Butt Lift® infomercial. Without hesitation, I went, got the job, and one week later I started a three-month intensive that would change my body - and my life - for the better.ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-84608329027968431582016-02-12T12:45:00.002-05:002016-02-12T13:59:44.847-05:00I've Seen This Room And I've Walked This Floor
(song: Hallelujah/ artist: Leonard Cohen)
I started physical therapy on January 14th. Prior to being cleared for PT by my surgeon, my only sanctioned activity was walking for 10 minutes at a time. That usually occurred in and around my apartment while wearing pajamas.
My first photographed PT walk. I was so high on pain meds.
I can go anywhere for PT but because I loved my experience at ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-77495923320301869112016-02-10T11:40:00.000-05:002016-02-10T12:21:07.373-05:00I Love The People Of My Village(song: People of My Village/artist: Rusted Root)
New York City can be a hard place. It's expensive, it's fast, and everyone is busy. I have to schedule my son's play dates weeks in advance to work around the sports/Mandarin/chess lessons of his over scheduled 8-year-old city kid counterparts. When disaster struck without warning and rendered this staffless housewife unable to fulfill her daily ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-61211039898642457882016-01-26T10:00:00.000-05:002016-01-27T07:18:06.494-05:00No More Turning Away From The Weak And The Weary(song: On The Turning Away/artist: Pink Floyd)
A couple of weeks ago I took my son to Whole Foods here in Brooklyn to get a cake for my husband's birthday. It was my first time in a public errand-running setting since the surgery. Naturally I chose one of the busiest times - the after school/pre-dinner rush - to go to the grocery store for the first time. What my son didn't (and shouldn't) ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-49320555936678857482016-01-18T11:21:00.001-05:002016-01-20T14:48:06.418-05:00Condition: Grounded, But Determined To Try(song: Learning to Fly/artist: Pink Floyd)
Jan. 5, 2016
Today was my 3-week follow-up with Dr. Rawlins, my surgeon from Hospital for Special Surgery. You might recall that we didn't have a lot of time to get to know each other as I only met him 48 hours before he sliced into my back, so it was nice to see him under slightly better circumstances. We reminisced about the day we met. He ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-90097242740889638022016-01-14T00:04:00.000-05:002016-01-14T00:35:02.945-05:00I'm Only Sad In A Natural Way(song: The Paris Match/artist: The Style Council)
I think the most difficult part of this temporarily (hopefully) life-altering injury and surgery are the extreme emotional swings I'm experiencing.* I'm the first to admit that I skew more dramatic than others; I feel every emotion with my whole self. And man, was my whole self feeling super sad when this nightmare started in November. It ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-26770056479129612802016-01-10T18:55:00.004-05:002016-02-13T10:46:54.135-05:00I'm Much Obliged For Such a Pleasant Stay(song: Ramble On/artist: Led Zeppelin)
If you're just joining us, my last post was all about the events that led to my emergency back surgery. Welcome.
My adventures at Hospital For Special Surgery: December 14 - 19
All smiles before surgery.
On oxy(gen) and Oxy(codone) after surgery.
Continuous leg massage. Heaven.
Timber!
The Bad:
A not uncommon but potentially dangerous ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-63805136033223585312015-12-31T00:57:00.000-05:002015-12-31T13:45:17.123-05:00I Knew This Day Was Coming, I Knew It Right From The Start
(song: Illusory Light/artist: Sarah Blasko)
Well kids, I'm fucked. At least, that's how I feel right now.
If you've seen my recent Facebook posts you know that I just had surgery on my back. Lower back pain is not new to me -- I referenced my battle with lower back pain in this post from 2011. And then again in October of this year when I forfeited a half-marathon I spent the summer ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-52446655246625614172015-10-21T23:37:00.000-04:002015-10-22T06:51:17.431-04:00The Pavement Is My Friend(Artist: Ed Sheeran/song: The City)
Well, I didn't run the half-marathon that I mentioned in my last post.
I trained and I was ready until my back decided that it wasn't. I have
three herniated discs that mostly give me no trouble, but for whatever
reason, they chose the week of my race to make a comeback. I decided my
long-term health was more important than one race. I was ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-35540332596295766602015-08-31T18:14:00.000-04:002015-08-31T18:36:53.775-04:00Those Lazy Days of Summer Are Here(song: Dry County/artist: The B-52s)
Hey y'all! Greetings from hot and humid Brooklyn, NY. I've just returned home after six weeks in my even hotter and more humid hometown of St. Simons Island, GA. As most of you know from my last post, I've been having a tough time figuring out who I am and what I want as I move forward in this new decade of my life. Being home with family and friends, and ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-73860660909268545932015-06-29T10:11:00.000-04:002015-09-25T15:51:08.744-04:00I'm Beginning To Feel the Years (But I'm Going To Be Okay)(song: Beginning to Feel the Years/artist: Brandi Carlile)
This month marks four years since I graduated from Booty School, A.K.A the Beachbody test group for the Brazil Butt Lift infomercial. Four years of being fit, working out, running races and maintaining an overall weight loss of 60 pounds. Four years of being Formerly Fat Mom. Great, what now? That is the question.
I turned 40 inALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-5151192726278582602014-12-01T16:56:00.000-05:002014-12-02T11:56:25.968-05:00Let Me Share This Whole New World With You (song:A Whole New World/artist:Alan Menken & Tim Rice)
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ALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4883846859799024130.post-77829114250727484092014-11-18T09:45:00.001-05:002014-11-18T09:45:31.823-05:00FORMERLY FAT MOM: Welcome, Welcome, Share This FeastFORMERLY FAT MOM: Welcome, Welcome, Share This FeastALISON HAZLEHURSThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10014037714421569811noreply@blogger.com