What I Like About You

(song: What I Like About You/artist: The Romantics)

Oh hey. I've been travelling without computer access, but fear not, I've been jotting things down on my trusty iPhone so I could paste my thoughts into a new post once I got my hands on a computer. I need a laptop!

Monday - June 13, 2011
Because I am so in love with Leandro and have now adopted his booty obsession, I got a guest pass to his Monday pool class at Equinox. Of course I wanted to see the Butt Master, but I also wanted to utilize the gym before my big infomercial interview. (By the way, the bathing suit I wore for today's class was the same one-piece I wore for my Polaroid at the audition back in February. Like everything I own now, the top was too big, but I safety-pinned the straps so my sad deflated boobs didn't go rogue during class. It's a SPANX brand bathing suit, so it's made of super thick suck-it-all-in Lycra. At the audition, my ass and thighs were oozing out of the leg holes like sausage from it's casing. You know how bad it looks when a big squishy butt doesn't all fit into your big-girl panties. It was the first of my mortifying experiences during this test group. Today, the suit looks not-so-great for an entirely different reason. How awesome is that?! Anyway...)

I suit up and head into the pool area. The first person I see is Georgia, the gorgeous blond Australian!! We hugged like it was a war buddy reunion. Come to think of it...
It was wonderful to see her. She was a knockout on day 1. Tall, with a flat belly. Maybe she had a dimple on her butt before but all I know is, I still don't look as good as she did on the first day. Now, she's flawless. She has my dream legs. Tall, lean and fit. A triple threat, if you will. Her booty is perfection. She was chosen to be in a couple of Leandro's videos and she also provided background booty sculpting moves on Leandro's recent QVC tour.

The gorgeous blond Australian
 We talked about how hard it is to lift yourself from the post-test-group depression. The obligation of class became such a routine for us. Throw in the daily food delivery and the amazing results, it's a full-time job that you never want to quit. I had trouble adjusting to three-days-week; I'm so glad I didn't have to go "cold turkey".

It was so fun to be in a class with her again. We got in trouble for talking too much - not unlike our test group days. I'm sorry that I didn't get more of an opportunity to spend time with her during the test group.

That's actually the one regret I have. Because of my son's school schedule, I always had to leave immediately following class, so I barely had a chance to socialize. I did meet a few girls that made an impression though. One girl was the hot blond that taught us the stripper routine on "sexy Thursday". She's surfer-babe beautiful - blond hair, blue eyes, killer body. She's also really smart and has a terrific sense of humor. She's like...a sexy hipster - if that were possible. Oh, and she's a competitive pole dancer, so she could cut down a tree using only the strength of her rock-hard abs. If she weren't so damn nice, I'd hate her. Instead I'm just extremely jealous of her.

Then there's the gal that read my blog and got offended, but then we had a "coming to Jesus" talk and ended up really liking each other. She's got a bawdy sense of humor, which I love. Kind-of a lady Howard Stern. We quickly felt comfortable telling each other really personal stories as we rushed to the subway after class. She's a remarkably strong woman with great insight, though she doesn't give herself enough credit for either. Also, I'd like to see her kick her Red Bull habit.

Then there was the rail-thin runway model. I of course assumed I wouldn't like her because, well, she's a rail-thin runway model. Isn't there a girl code rule that tells us to hate tall, thin, pretty girls? She's actually really grounded and kind. When she tells me she's praying for me, I believe her. We had a very in-depth conversation about family one day after class, and she helped me to see some things in a completely different way. This one chat had a huge impact on me.

I miss talking to the gorgeous Australian, the sexy pole dancer, the potty-mouthed Red Bull addict and the religious model. I shared an amazing experience with all of them. We all came into the test group for our own reasons. I learned a lot about acceptance; of myself and others. And learned not to make assumptions about strangers. Take a second to get to know people. You might be surprised.